A Game of Bad Apologies review—It’s my party, and I’ll laugh/cry if I want to

Chances are you’ve played this game: One player plays a card from one of two decks, all of the other players play a card from their hand from a second deck of cards that they think matches what the first player played, and then the first player chooses which card matches best in their opinion, handing a win to the player who played it. It’s a tried and true formula that has spawned hundreds, if not thousands of games. From matching adjectives to nouns, to naughty madlibs, to creating a crass comic strip, it is nothing short of amazing how many themes and variations using those simple rules have brought players to the table over and over again since Cards Against Humanity hit the scene, and it’s even more amazing that a lot of them are genuinely good. Hurt Party designed by Ami Baio of Pink Tiger Games is one of the good ones.

Before I cut the cake and break out the party favors, let me give you some reassurance: this game does not lean into crassness or casually enable people to engage in racism, bigotry or misogyny like so many games in this category do. It is eminently family friendly while still allowing for a bit of spiciness at an adults-only table, largely because it is a game that is rooted in its humanity rather than disdainful of it. Everyone, big or small, young or old, gets their feelings hurt by someone else, and invariably hurts someone else’s feelings as well, and that universally shared experience is where Hurt Party sits. One player (the ‘hurt party’) plays a card from the pink deck (which describes how their feelings got hurt), all of the other players play a card from their hand from the blue deck (made up of apologies), and then the first player chooses the apology that matches best in their opinion. Frankly, this is one of the best executions of this mechanic I’ve seen since Joking Hazard, and it comes down to two things: empathy and delivery.

Leaving room for empathy

I would argue that most players will approach this like every other game in this genre, with all of the cynicism, sarcasm, and buffoonery they can muster, and believe me, that is plenty fun. However, my wife, whose capacity for empathy is like a shining beacon in a dark world, ran away with every game we’ve played because she was utterly, convincingly apologetic, the apology cards she played were perfect responses, and more often than not the entire table would agree she deserved the win. She absolutely crushed us, and she did it with empathy. 

It’s all in the delivery

What really makes Hurt Party fun, however, is how players read their chosen apology, and the funniest moments often came from an exaggerated plea, sarcastic tone, or droll recitation. At one game, we had a player who spent years as a customer service representative for a tech company, and he immediately got into his old groove, flinging out sincere insincerity like he still got paid to do it. No other implementation of this kind of game has ever rewarded player performance like this one, and I am here for it.

Ultimately, for all I like about Hurt Party, it is still a riff off of Apples to Apples and Cards Against Humanity, and retains their shortcomings. Repeated plays offer diminished returns as players gain more familiarity with the decks and the same apology cards start winning the same hurt party cards every game, just because they happen to be a good fit. (The solution, of course, is to throw card expansions at it, which is at best a temporary fix). Also, I find it curious that every game in this genre offers rules for points and an endgame, but nobody ever uses them because the mechanics are all you really need. It’s like adding scoring conditions to Spin the Bottle or Truth or Dare- it’s just not the point.

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